Intense

Life with the twins has gone all intense again.  I think we are all just so ready for the move now and whilst summer is of course much easier than winter, being outside on a super hot summers day is a no no.  Give me clouds and rain when I am looking after the twins on my own.  At least then we can be outside.  There are so many beautiful lakes and Emilia just loves having a paddle, but I just don't feel comfortable being there on my own with them.  I need to clone myself!

A few weeks ago we met up with the twins' neonatal Dr who was super impressed with them; I think meeting our girls has quite an emotional effect on her.  They are such a success story compared to some of the horrors and heartache she must experience on a day to day basis.  She said it is like looking at a big and a little sister, not only in terms of size but also in terms of development.  She said that Eva is more like a 19 month old baby and Emilia like a 15 month old.  Even though Emilia is behind Eva, her development is consistent and she is not concerned about anything.  Fantastic news :)

On Tuesday I took Emilia so see the eye Dr.  Both me and my Mum had noticed that she was going cross eyed sometimes, more than usual.  So I called the hospital and expressed by concerns.  After an eye examination, Emilia has now been diagnosed with needing to wear glasses.  This news has hit me quite hard.  Not because of the extra work of getting my wild, little Emilia to keep her glasses on, or to stop Eva from pulling them off (actually that side of things is gonna be tough!!!) But her needing to wear glasses is because she was laser operated, because she was premature, because I got an infection.  It all leads back to me and it hurts.  It hurts that she has been going around now for the last months not being able to see properly, which explains why she falls over a lot and why when the floor changes she stops and needs lots of encouragement to walk further.  It hurts that almost EVERYTHING that has gone wrong because of the premature birth has been on Emilia.  I know it could all be a lot worse and I say thank you every night before I go to sleep.  I am thankful for it all, but this still hurts.

Rant over, here are some picture from the last couple of weeks.

A short, but very sweet meeting with faster Cajsa, Olivia, Alice, farfar and farmor:

Two very proud little girls with two very cute pot bellies:

Me and my little warrior:

Eva catching flies and looking super cute.  She went nappy free for the first time :) Such a big girl:

Emilia and Pappa:

Chilling out in the garden - paradise: