Update

They took the last x-ray this morning.  When we arrived the surgeon was with Emilia and he inserted 3 different widths of metal rods into the opening.  The x-ray had shown that there could be something blocking the opening, but the rods went in no problem and some poo came out.  The contrast liquid came into the bag this afternoon.  So they are now going to wait and observe.  She is getting 2ml of food every six hours and they are going to increase the amount gradually.  As it stands at the moment she doesn't need another operation but there is always a possibility that she will need one sometime in the future.  Her small intestine looks OK but not really good and they don't need to take any more pictures at the moment so we feel pretty satisfied with the outcome.

Emilia explored my breast for the first time today and she loved it!  We gave Eva another bath and she had a lovely time.  We left them both with good saturation levels, cosy and tucked up in bed :)

Update

Eva and Emilia had a good afternoon with us today.  Jens held Emilia and I held Eva, who had another try at breastfeeding.  She is so cute!

They took two more x-rays during the day and another one is scheduled for tomorrow morning, which means no food until then :(  Emilia is pooing into her bag and the doctors are happy with how her waste looks.  I hope they are just airing on the side of caution to get a clear picture of what is going on inside her. I am praying that it is nothing serious.  So far the surgeons have not been concerned about what they have seen.  Fingers crossed!

Eva almost weighs 1,8kg and does what she does best every day; eating, sleeping on her belly and pooing!  She is still getting help with her breathing on the cpap but sat out on me today with the nasal cannula (thanks Louise!) for 4,5 hours and did really well.

Things are moving in the right direction for our baby girls.  Only seven weeks to go, less if we are lucky :)
 

Update

I came home yesterday to a beautiful bunch of flowers waiting for me on the doorstep from The English School.  Thank you!  I promise that I will bring Emilia and Eva to see you all as soon as I can.

Overall yesterday was a pretty good day.  To get a clear picture of what is going on inside Emilia they have done another contrast x-ray, where they put a liquid into her and take a series of x-rays to see its journey into the little bag.  She had four x-rays yesterday and will have another one this morning.  The surgeons were satisfied with the pictures taken yesterday and we will find out soon enough about the one they take this morning.

Our Dr looked at the x-rays first before consulting with the surgeons and he told us that the pictures didn't look perfect and it was difficult for him to reach a conclusion about them.  So that was the bad part of the day that gave us both tummy ache, but the surgeons, who know more, thought they looked OK.  It is hard though not to think that more problems are going to arise in the future.  But she pooed quite a lot yesterday too which is another good sign.

Eva lay on me for 3 hours and then on Jens for another 3.  I held Emilia for 3 hours and it was lovely.  When we put her back into bed she was really awake and so I lay my head on her bed and snuggled into her, showering her with kisses. 

Update

We got to the hospital at around 14.00 yesterday.  At 15.00 Jens held Emilia and she got to try the new oxygen thing in her nose (I still don't know the name of it in English!).  At first she was a little bit restless and her oxygen saturation level was quite low so they were going to change her back, but as they were about to do it she went up to 90 and stayed there for 3 hours.  She found a snuggly spot close to Jens' armpit, managed to relax and had a good sleep.

I met up with the psychologist at 16.15, then ate and then at 18.00 I held Eva.  First she lay at my breast and did some exploring for about 30 minutes and then she lay on my chest.  When Jens had put Emilia back he went to watch football, so I was left holding Eva and facing Emilia.  For the whole time Emilia was unable to relax.  When they put her back to bed they changed her over to the cpap machine again which has a mask and pretty big tubes coming from it.  Moving your head from side to side is pretty difficult to do.  Emilia however managed to do it, alone, about 10 times.  When the mask is not in place the machine beeps, plus her saturation kept going up and down (it probably wasn't but when she wriggles around it is difficult to get an accurate reading) causing the other machine to beep.

So all I wanted to do the whole time was go and comfort her and try to calm her down.  The two other babies on our ward also needed quite a lot of help and there were times when I could see that she had moved her head and had to call after the nurse.  It was a horrible experience and I had stomach ache the whole time.  In the end I cut my time short with Eva just so I could hold my hand over her, sing to her and stroke her little head. 

The nurses believed that the reason for her behaving like this was because she had pains in her stomach.  Since she passed the hard poo last Thursday, hardly anything else has come in her bag.  So they got the Dr in to look at her and they decided to give her a stomach x-ray.  As you can imagine, I was freaking out.  The x-ray did not show anything too worrying and just after midnight a surgeon looked at her and squirted water into the opening of her small intestine.  Some poo came out and since then she has passed 2 ml.  The surgeon did not believe there was anything physical stopping her from pooing which is a relief but I am still worried.  When I called for an update at 06.00 they told me that she had been calm in the night. 

So last night was another extremely low point for me and I felt really angry and irritated.  Emilia has had enough, we have had enough.  We are going to spend a lot of time at the hospital today, she is so much calmer and happier when she is being held.  

A cosy evening

I just held Emilia for 4 hours and it was lovely.  As the poor little thing is now withdrawing from morphine, she is finding it hard to be calm.  But for the first two hours she just rested on me.  Then her restlessness came in waves but when I sang to her and stroked her head she calmed down.  She even turned her head twice, she really does have some power behind her :)

We gave Eva her third bath tonight too.  She got to wear the little plastic thing that gives oxygen to her via her nose and is the next stage after the cpap! (I am not sure what it is called in English) It is the stage they have to take in order to come home.  So she was wearing it throughout her bath and then whilst she lay on Jens for three hours after.  She handled it really well :)  She is back on the cpap machine now though as they want to introduce it gently and not tire her out too much.  This really is progress.

Feeling relaxed

My lovely friends have just left after our sleepover to celebrate Mandy's 30th birthday.  Not only did they come with a gorgeous bouquet of flowers, Christina had planned all the food and then cooked it all.  They are absolute sweethearts who I love dearly.  It was nice to have a normal night, drinking red wine and laughing so hard I thought I was going to pee my pants.  It feels lovely to be alive today.

I have called for 2 updates since leaving the hospital yesterday afternoon, which was very hard to do considering Emilia had just gone back on the cpap machine.  She is doing shockingly well, much better than could have been expected.  She isn't back with Eva yet.  They are going to wait until the needle into her central vein is removed as there is a risk that Eva could pull it out.    I really don't think it could happen though as all Eva does is sleep on her tummy. Opening her tiny little eyes is enough of an effort for her! But they know best and good things do come to those who wait.

So we are heading over to the hospital later this afternoon and we are going to give Eva a bath.  I really hope that I get to have snuggle time with Emilia. 

Emilia :)

Could Grandma Lindqvist ask for a better 60th birthday present than her granddaughter Emilia being back on the cpap machine and breathing all by herself with only 35% oxygen.

Things are looking up :)